1、有个胖妹问马场管理员：“奇怪，你们马场什么时候来了一头骆驼，而且是双峰的？”

管理员：“不瞒您说，它不是骆驼，是上次被你骑过的马！”

2、母蚊子：“孩子，你怎么啦？”小蚊子哭着说：“今天小苍蝇它们欺负我，说我嗜血成性，是吸血鬼。”

母蚊子：“别理它们，它们家也不是什么好东西，一个个都是吃屎长大的。”

天在马路上看到一辆严重超载的摩的，到三叉路口时，交警叔叔摇手示意他停下。强大的司机大叔喊：“坐不下啦！”随后扬长而去。

眉毛，是脸上的一抹亮色，有时候像一群蚂蚁在前额上忙碌，有时候像两把小梳子在调整心情。

有的人的眉毛像两只小猫咪，有的人的眉毛像两把小刀子，有的人的眉毛像两条小溪流。无论怎样，眉毛都是我们脸上不可或缺的一部分，是我们表情的重要组成部分。

你眉眼灵动仙如画，嘴角浅笑醉嫣然

看他那没弯弯的眉毛真好

我来奉献一个[害羞]

英语幽默小故事：Five Months Older

　　The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.

　　But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.

　　"How old are you?" he said.

　　"Eighteen, sir," said John.

　　"But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?"

　　"Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."

　　幽默故事翻译：五个月大

　　第二次世界大战开始了，约翰想参军，可他只有十六岁，当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时，他说他已经十八岁了。

　　可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天，而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时，感到非常惊奇。

　　“你多大了?”军医问。

　　“十八，长官。”约翰说。

　　“可你的哥哥也是十八岁，你们是双胞胎吗?”

　　约翰脸红了，说：“哦，不是，长官，我哥哥比我大五个月。”

Here's a short English humor story:

Two hunters are out in the woods when one suddenly falls to the ground.

"What happened?" asks the other.

"I shot myself in the foot," replied the hunter.

"How could you do that?"

"I was cleaning my gun and I thought it was my foot."

I hope you enjoyed that!